i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
