Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
