I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
i barfeds in our rink
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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