i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize