plz talk dirty to me
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
