I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
