hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
The beers last night were like the tears from god
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Randomize
