Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
