I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
