her vagine was all disorganized.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize