the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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