Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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