I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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