i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
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