i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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