Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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