He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
