You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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