his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
