Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
