let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
