I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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