can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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