just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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