He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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