we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
