I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
