There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize