I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
