i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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