end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I need a burrito and a hug.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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