I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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