I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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