I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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