i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
