I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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