are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
