there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize