Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Randomize