Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
