last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
