So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
