why didn't you poke me back
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Dicks are not precious.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
