i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
