When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
