question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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