Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
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