absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
