dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
