we're blogging at a bar
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
