We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize