They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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