it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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